I don't know if it's because of my friend's death or what, but this week, I spent a lot of time thinking about the fact that I'm never going to be able to drink again. There was a VFW bar right next door to the funeral parlor and I kept thinking, "Wouldn't it be nice to go in there and tie one on with the rest of them?" I know that where a lot of people B-Lined to after the wake.
I confess that I did have a non-alcoholic beer the other night. I am not as against that as some alcoholics are, I don't consider it cheating or whatever. Especially since it doesn't lead to anything other than a cup of tea or water. But at the very least, it does tell me that I need to be doing more self care and work on my sobriety.
Tonight is my SMART meeting. Just in time, I think.
Argh. My comments keep disappearing.
ReplyDeletePlease keep up the self care! This is a journey, and it takes a lot of self kindness!
Thank you, Anne! We did a few exercises last night and had a "take home" one, as well. There was a lot of conversation about the upcoming holiday weekend. The 4th of July isn't a big triggery holiday for me. Not like Thanksgiving, where I am standing in a house full of boozy people (all folks I love dearly). This one isn't as big a deal for me. Hope you are well, my friend.
ReplyDeleteHow's the trudging going?
ReplyDeleteI'm feeling good. It's Monday and I'm not hungover!
My hubby drinks the dealcoholized beer. I see no difference between a mock tail and one....
Going great! Thanks! Glad you are feeling good! I really go back and forth on the non-alcoholic beer and I think it's really all about whether or not it poses a problem for the person. I have read that some people go straight back to booze after having just one. I don't feel that way about it. It doesn't make me want to have a real beer because it doesn't make me feel the way real beer does. The taste is nice sometimes. It's good to have one around the firepit or if I'm at a restaurant. Honestly, I'm just as happy drinking other things, too. I don't considering it cheating or whatever. I'm still listening to podcasts, still going to meetings and, most importantly, still not drinking :)
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